(AP)

I now find myself monitoring stories in the news, waiting for the inevitable apology. And so it is with this story. Last week actress Cameron Diaz visited Peru as part of ... well, it doesn't really matter. What matters is her culturally insensitive accessorizing. You see, on a visit to China she picked up this adorable, uh, olive green canvas shoulder bag decorated with a big red star and the slogan "Serve the People" — apparently a favorite saying of Chairman Mao — written in Chinese characters. And she thought this would be just perfect to carry along on her trip to Peru.

One small problem. I'll let Hugo at the Miami Poetry Review explain:

Diaz thought the bag was little more than a fashionable accessory, but what she didn't realize is that Mao was the inspiration for the "Shining Path" insurgency that battled with the Peruvian government throughout the 80s and into the 90s, leaving over 70,000 dead and severely injuring the country's collective psyche.

Well, thank God she left the Che Guevara t-shirt at home. Communist chic is so over.

Some Peruvians took offense. The celebrity apology was, as I said, inevitable:

I sincerely apologize to anyone I may have inadvertently offended. The bag was a purchase I made as a tourist in China and I did not realize the potentially hurtful nature of the slogan printed on it," Diaz said in a statement e-mailed to The Associated Press.

..."I'm sorry for any people's pain and suffering and it was certainly never my intention to reopen what I now know is a painful wound in this country's history," she said.

Diaz also spoke of Peruvians' beauty and warmth and said she wished "for their continued healing." ("Cameron Diaz apologizes for Maoist bag," Yahoo! News)

In other words, she knew jumping jack squat about Peru's recent history, the Shining Path (Sendero Luminoso in  the Spanish) or, for that matter, Chairman Mao, who's slogan she was so proudly displaying on her shoulder bag. (Cameron, you might look up the Chinese Cultural Revolution and the Great Leap Forward, just to get started.)

But that, of course, is why world travel is such a good thing. You can learn about other cultures and expand your understanding of the world. So good for Cameron. She's learned a valuable lesson. Or, at least her publicist who emailed her statement to the Associated Press did. This really looks like one of those "I'm sorry you were offended" apologies, which almost isn't an apology at all. The sorry you were offended apology has a subtext of "What is your problem, anyway?"

Still, "I'm sorry for cluelessly promoting the Maoist doctrines that inspired a violent conflict in your country that caused the deaths of tens of thousands of Peruvians," might be a bit much to ask from the star of There's Something About Mary.

(Incidentally, my spell checker suggests replacing "Diaz" with "ditz." I'm not making this up.)

But never mind the Maoist shoulder bag ... what she really needs to apologize for is the rest of her outfit. She's got a kind of college dorm study hall thing going there.

One last fashion tip for you, Cameron. If you ever visit Auschwitz, I'd pass on the "Arbeit macht frei" handbag.

DATE OF APOLOGY: June 25, 2007
APOLOGIZER: Cameron Diaz
APOLOGIZEE: Peru
FOR: Fasion faux paus